my life

 my life is ...

... not perfect.

my life is full of hopes, dreams and wishes.

there are some accomplishments,

but also disappointments.

there are afternoons spent daydreaming,

or with a laptop and very late movie nights

when i tell myself i should be doing something more productive.

in my life,

there are doubts & uncertainties.

but there are also wonderful moments,
encouragements & supports

from loved ones.
they always know how to make me laugh and smile.

my life is full of mood swings.

sometimes i feel giddy

and the next moment i am devastated or enraged

(usually depending on how long it's been since my last grocery or meal).

my life is still shaping itself

and what it will look like

both in the days and years that are to come,

and that's pretty scary.

in my head,

i have an ideal life.

a life full of adventures,

of dreams fulfilled,

of beauty & contentment,

of wonderful moments always put to their best use.

of pursuing hobbies that fill every inch of my free time,

of challenges surmounted and rewards that are rich.

every day,

i try and strive

to live this life.

so far, it's not perfect...

(and it probably never will be)

but i'm getting there bit by bit.

and for now,

i try to enjoy every imperfect moment

of my messy, confusing, crazy right-now life

because if i didn't,

i wouldn't really be living...

would i?

- m o n i c a -