move out

i haven't been sleeping well at all at nights for a long time now, i'm beginning to consider taking sleeping pills just to get some really good sleep. free of worry, total and complete brain rest. i've been worrying a lot and i think the stress is already showing.

i want to do so many things. i want to clean our room and throw out all the clothes and shoes that should never be worn again. i want to pack and organize everything, buy new stuff and make our small room look really neat and nice. we have a very small room and our things are just impossible to fit in. i need more space. i need closets and dressers. i need a new room.

we've been living like this for a long time and it's about time to move out.

my passion

one of the great things that have come along with blogging is my passion for photography, and arts and interior designs. i took up fine arts advertising which i now realize it should have been interior design. i wasn't able to graduate because i got pregnant and started a family at a young age. in other words, my passion for arts was abruptly halted. so seeing people who are mad crazy about their passion, especially with the help of technology, has left me wondering, am i too old for this and maybe already too late to even start now?

i love blogging. and i am so overwhelmed because there are lots of passion, talents, great style and taste flying around out here in the blog world, at times i feel maxed out with all the creativeness i come across from surfing the web. to see how they have achieved so much and how well they put things together, it completely makes me feel very insecure about how i do my own thing here. and to be honest, it's the reason behind the lack of posts lately. i know i shouldn't be feeling this way. it's a shame that i do.

i guess what i wanted to say is, i am still finding out what i really want. but not just for myself anymore, but for my family. it is still all there and out there and all i have to do choose and make it work. i am forever thankful that blogging existed when i needed it the most. inspiration is a very strong motivation. 

i know i am going to be happy wherever life takes me and i want to put it in writing about what i feel now.

i recently created another blog account for a project i am working on. no financial help from anyone, nothing.  just passion and lots and lots of positive thinking :)

Untitled

i guess i have been thinking too much (as always of course). you can tell by the entries of my posts. these are things that come to mind when i need to let out and let go, and it's nice to have this place where i can do that.  i' wonder if it has anything to do with my hormones. when i am not in front of my laptop, most times, everything sounds so much more organized and better in my head, but the minute i start typing it i get lost for words and ideas for no reason.

and today is just one of them.

pause...

and so,  instead, 

i would like to end this post with a song i like since high school. what can i say? i am a sentimental girl with sentimental taste.

Stuck

when my mind wanders I want it to go to a good place. I work during the day and have no time to blog, only at night or on weekends. I feel most comfortable and happy here writing my feelings away or browsing inspirations. It gives me freedom. Though I find it difficult lately to organize my thoughts and what I would want to share when different ideas come all at the same time. It feels overwhelming sometimes. I don't know if you ever felt that - feeling kind of stuck while inspirations are piling up.

 how do you do it?